Sometimes I find myself cheating on everyone, making me pretend that everything is ok and that i'm not thinking anymore in that little things that happened once upon the time. Feels like a stab right through my head and bones, but I must admit that it couldn't be better if I were different and said the things that I'm feeling. It might seem like I love the pain and all that stuff, but it's so difficult to find another way and say "Hi, hello, I'm here, I need you." I know what answer I'll get. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I'm just scared of being alone, it's a crying shame to want to fight for that one that I want, but inside of me everything say "Don't do it." and I back down. It hurts.